Impromptu River Visit

Around here in Humboldt County, warm sunny days are a rarity.
Usually we hit around 60 degrees.
Fahrenheit.
Yesterday was one of those nice warm sunny days.
So we took to the river. Where I guess it’s always sunny. But whatever.

I had the afternoon off, and when I got home I helped Steve finish up ceviche, and he made some alcoholic concoction and we took off.
Like Thelma and Louise,
If Thelma and Louise were two gay men that had a dog and weren’t running from the cops and just wanted to go to the river to lay out in the sun and eat ceviche.

Ceviche is usually some sort of seafood that is “cooked” with the power of citrus juice. Usually limes.
And it’s perfect for picnic food.

This just so happens to be shrimp ceviche.
That doesn’t really have a recipe.
Make some and go to the river.
or the beach. with margaritas.
Easy Mango Margaritas?
Thelma and Louise did all that, right?

Also, special note: Bright sunlight leads to crappy picture conditions.

Recipe after the jump


Shrimp Ceviche
About a pound of shrimp, mixed with about 2 cups of lime juice and some seasoning salt.
Let that sit for 10-30 min.
While that’s sitting, dice up a couple pounds of tomatoes and a cucumber.
Chop up an avocado. and some cilantro.
and Slice up some red onion. mix it all together and throw in the shrimp and about half the cooking liquid.
Serve on tostadas or just eat with a fork, or break up the tostadas like chips because if you’re like me you can’t eat tostadas properly.

I’m a Filthy Whorish Liar

So I didn’t move completely.
I came back.
I still plan on putting collaborations up on here.
Tumblr was just not helpful in the customization dept.
Plus here I easily made my own domain.
And plus this is where it started.
Also I realize that there’s a post below that says Best. Oatmeal. Ever.

That’s a lie too.
I’ll post the good stuff soon.

Bacon & Hot Dogs & Guacamole & Margaritas

I realize the above is not the prettiest for picture time, but I will inhale anything with guacamole on it. I’ve been known to just eat a couple spoonfuls at random, or have the following guacamole to chip ratio:

approx. 8:1

 My version of guacamole is straightforward:
mashed avocado with a spoonful of salsa, a squeeze of lime,  & a sprinkle of garlic powder, s & p, and cumin.

If you have not had guacamole on your hot dog, then you need to get on that.
Tonight.

or Tomorrow.

The bacon isn’t necessary but you should at least try the guacamole.

And this easy mango margarita involves no peeling or cutting of a mango.

Just mango nectar, tequila, and lime juice.

To be exact:
4 oz. mango nectar
1.5 oz good tequila, I highly recommend this brand. It’s inexpensive, smooth, and the first thing I noticed was the bottle and label design.
and the juice of 1/2-1 whole lime

This is all to taste. Add more or less lime if you want. or maybe you’re one of those people that likes to be super drunk really fast. Go ahead and add more tequila.

I will judge you though if you start to yell unreasonable things and tell me you hate my choice of planting orange flowers.

Also, a little birdie told me peach margaritas are delicious, and I wouldn’t turn down a strawberry one. And there just so happens to be nectar of those fruits. At most grocery stores.

You should probably make some with that hot dog and guacamole.
Tonight.

or Tomorrow.

Not Taco Seasoning

This is not a taco.

It’s a burrito.

There is rice. and that would just be a ridiculous taco. But on occasion I make tacos that size. With a fried flour tortilla.

They’re called monster tacos. Get with it.

This is not one of those occasions.

But the seasoning I used is “taco seasoning”, or at least my version of it. When I was a kid those brightly colored packets of seasoning meant taco night. Or else it was just tortillas with meat in them. I like taco seasoning. I won’t deny that. But it’s got a load of sodium in it. Sometimes you can actually taste that sodium over all the spices.

No Bueno.

This version is better, and easy, and cheap to make. The spices show up the salt.

Es Bueno.

Go make some. Run your pretty little legs, or pretty big man legs, or pretty little man legs over to the bulk spice section in your grocery store and pick up the following:
Chili Powder, Cumin, Garlic Powder, Onion Powder, & Ground Coriander.
And put it in everything.

Just do it.

Did somebody say Ranch Dressing?
I’m workin’ up a tasty recipe. that you could throw this into. or not. but you probably should. Taco Salad is seriously one of the most amazing things ever thought up. And I’m gonna make some, and share it with everyone.

Taco Salad for everyone!

But that burrito up there, is a flour tortilla, topped with “spanish rice” then cheese, then ground turkey seasoned with the seasoning, cooked up with an ear of corn, then refried beans, then guacamole, then a little bit of Salsa.

Then I attempted to roll it all up but got it all over my hands because that is way too much for that tortilla. True Story.

Fun Fact: Coriander is the seed of the cilantro plant. But it tastes nothing like it. It’s almost lemony. Tell that to the cashier and show off a little.

Updated seasoning here

 
“Spanish Rice”
Grab a 1 c measuring cup. Fill it with long grain rice and put that rice into a small pot with a couple teaspoons of oil a pinch of cumin and a pinch of coriander.  Let that rice get coated with oil and slightly toasted. Grab that same measuring cup and fill it with chicken stock. Pour that in the pot. Then grab that same measuring cup and fill it halfway with a good salsa. Fill it the rest of the way with chicken stock and let them join the party. Reduce the heat to a simmer, pop a lid on and turn the timer on for 20 min. When that goes off, stir, and enjoy, and put more than necessary in a burrito.

I moved!!

After over a year of no posts I’m back, In a new home. Come check me out, and follow me over there. We should see how long this one lasts. I plan on opening it up past food, and include some design tips, and have some collaborative projects with some very talented friends of mine. Come Get Some!!

I Say Garbanzo – Hummus and Roasted Garbanzo Beans

You say Chickpea, I say Garbanzo.

Because it’s more fun than chickpeas. And because Garbanzo sounds more manly. Look at this: Chick and pea  vs.  GARBANZO, the newest addition to the Autobots, that only speaks Spanish.

Step aside, Dora/Handy Manny.

Plus that’s what the cans call ’em. Garbanzo Beans.

Garbanzo Beans are one of those things that cannot be matched in flavor. They have their own taste that makes things like hummus even more special.They also have the ability to become all kinds of crunchy when roasted and will rival any chip or pretzel or salty bit of goodness.

And they are extremely easy and inexpensive to cook on your own.

Lets look at the price. On sale 1 14oz can of chickpeas comes in at .68, yielding about a cup and a half. Everyday price of Garbanzo’s in the bulk section – .79, yielding about 5 1/2 c when cooked.

And dry bean gets the square.

Ease of preparation, for almost any bean:

Rinse under cold water, sort through for bad beans and small pebbles.
Soak beans in twice as much water overnight, no longer than 12 hours, in a cool place, or the beans could sour.
Add a little bit of oil to help battle the foam, and begin to heat, uncovered over medium/high heat until boiling. Reduce to a simmer and cook for 30 min.
Add 2 t of salt, for every pound of beans, at this point in time and cook for another 30 min.
Check for doneness and drain if done, using in whatever recipe you’d like. Beans also freeze well, and I’d imagine you could use the liquid to be extra BA and can your own beans.

Remember with chickpeas, they aren’t supposed to be as soft as other beans, they almost need to be cooked al dente.

Now I know what you’re thinking: “Billy?! What if I  don’t want to freeze or can beans? What am I supposed to do with 5 1/2 c of garbanzos?”

Pull yourself together, I’ve got hummus

and a crunchy snack.

First up, the hummus. This is one of those recipes that I barely messed with. I’ve never made hummus before, and I’ve tasted it a few times, so I wouldn’t be able to say yay or nay to any of the ingredients. When I want to make a dish for the first time I usually head to Alton Brown or Ina Garten, and I read quite a bit of the reviews. This is especially helpful when I’m trying to make something that has a thousand variations, like hummus. I landed on an episode of Good Eats on YouTube that revolved around legumes, and had a hummus recipe. I went for it.

The only ingredient that is supposed to be crucial in Hummus is Tahini. It’s a paste made of toasted sesame seeds, much like peanut or almond butter is. It’s also extremely expensive, like 7 bucks for a jar that would spoil before I’d be able to use it up. Alton Brown used smooth peanut butter, and I will never question Alton on anything related to food, so I got extra excited to see it was ok not to use Tahini and go for the extremely inexpensive cousin.

The only reason these ingredients are supposed to be in the hummus is to give it a light, nutty flavor. A couple of the reviews said all I could taste was the peanut butter, but I think they may have added the full amount. I went with half and it was just enough.

Here’s a little tip that I would think would be common sense, but what do I know:
If a recipe calls for a varied amount on an ingredient, go with the smallest amount and add, according to taste – I’m just sayin’.

When it comes to roasted chickpeas, it’s even easier than the Hummus. Just grab some chickpeas and throw them on a baking sheet with a tablespoon or so of olive oil, some salt, pepper, and whatever seasonings you want to add. My personal favorite is a healthy dose of cumin, to make it almost like falafel bites, then you roast away for 40 min at 400 degrees, shaking the pan every 15 min to make sure everybody’s sharing properly. Seriously, try these. You wont be disappointed. They taste great by themselves or thrown into a salad for a crunch factor. I went with some lettuce, tomato, tuna, and a pepperoncini dressing – recipe after the jump.

All legumes are extremely healthy for you and are a great source of protein for vegetarians and meat eaters alike. I have plans to cook one pot of beans a week and use them throughout for meals. You should do the same.

Hummus
Slightly adapted from Alton Brown’s Turbo Hummus.

1 1/2 c cooked garbanzo beans, or 1 can if you have a really good excuse.
small handful of parsley
3 cloves garlic, chopped finely, or microplaned
1/3 c reserved cooking, or canning, liquid
the zest and juice of 1 lemon
1 1/2 T smooth peanut butter
splash of hot sauce
pinch of salt and pepper
1/4-1/3 olive oil, I used 1/4 c

Throw the garbanzo’s, parsley and garlic into a food processor, zip around until nicely combined.

Add everything else except the olive oil. Pulse until combined.

Flip the processor on and slowly add the olive oil until the desired consistency is reached.

Pepperoncini dressing

1/2 c sour cream
2-3 T mayo
1/2 t each garlic powder, onion powder, and kosher salt
1/4 c pepperoncini juice, from the jar you should have in your fridge
1/2 c buttermilk
pinch of pepper

mix all the ingredients together and store in the fridge for up to 1 week. It’s a little spicy so taste before you add the pepper.